Top 10
TOP TEN Moments when you should sense danger in chess:
 
10. There has been a change in the pawn structure. Your opponent has eight and you don’t have
any.
9. Your opponent begins to throw pawns at your eyes.
8. You have a position won, but your opponent has a gun.
7. The Director tells you not to bother turning in your score sheet after the game.
6. Before the game begins you notice your opponent’s first initials are GM.
5. After completing your development you sense your opponent is playing the endgame.
4. Just as you make your opening move your opponent announces mate in 11.
3. You don’t control any squares at all.
2. Your draw offer sends all the people watching your game into uncontrollable laughter.
1. Your opponent has three bishops.

Sadly I doubt Mr.Letterman has much knowledge of chess.

He did play Garry Kasparov :)

I forgot about that. Thank you.