{'gamma's' preface comment: I had one of my periodically reoccurring
dreams last night, where I found myself several hundred {and some-
times thousands} of miles away from 'home'.. and aggravatingly short
of the amount of money I needed to return home.
 
..As my dream ran its course, the solution lay in making amends with
those who 'popped-up' in the same 'geographic' area that I found
myself in.
..It turned out that while I was focused on my own 'hurt' {supposedly
committed by those same people} I succeeded in minimizing my Own
dysfunctional interactions}.
 
Nine Steps to Forgiveness
 
Frederic Luskin, Ph.D.

1. Know exactly how you feel about what happened and be able to articulate what about the situation is not OK. Then, tell a trusted couple of people about your experience. {Or perhaps better yet, 'mention it' to {your} God!}

2. Make a commitment to yourself to do what you have to do to feel better. Forgiveness is Mainly for Your benefit, and not so much, anyone else{!}

3. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciliation with the person that hurt you, or condoning of their action. What you are after is to find peace. Forgiveness can be defined as the "peace and understanding that come from blaming that which has hurt you less, taking the life experience less personally, and changing your grievance story."

4. Get the right perspective on what is happening. Recognize that your primary distress is coming from the hurt feelings, thoughts and physical upset you are suffering now, not what offended you or hurt you two minutes - or ten years -ago. Forgiveness helps to heal those hurt feelings.

5. At the moment you feel upset practice a simple stress management technique to soothe your body's flight or fight response.

6.
 
Give up expecting things from other people, or your life , that they do not choose to give you. Recognize the "unenforceable rules" you have for your health or how you or other people must behave. Remind yourself that you can hope for health, love, peace and prosperity and work hard to get them.

7.
 
Put your energy into looking for another way to get your positive goals met than through the experience that has hurt you. Instead of mentally replaying your hurt seek out new ways to get what you want.

8. Remember that a life well lived is your best revenge. Instead of focusing on your wounded feelings, and thereby giving the person who caused you pain power over you, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you. Forgiveness is about personal power.

9. Amend your grievance story to remind yourself of the 'heroic' choice to forgive. {fini}

But what about some kid at the mall riding his skate board into my Potty Wheel Chair and knocks me over and then laughs and spits on me when i b down n out?
 
My response - Bless U my son, u b a fool but u can't help it - it b n your genes and God has given this event so as to test my faith and so that U can learn something (since i also pray that God will put u n a Potty Wheel Chair) -- is that "forgiveness"?
 
Yes - No - Maybe - Sorta - Close - U need mental help ???

..Sometimes the 'Powers-that-Be' permit us to be used as what
I'll call, 'an innocent aggrieved-party "object-lesson" for
All others'; including.. ultimately, the offending 'party.'
..I don't claim to totally understand it; esp. from a 'Big-
Picture' standpoint, but that it exists cannot be denied; as
in, the W.W. 2 Nazi 'Holocaust'.. and any number of crimes
committed, in which the innocent suffer.
 
..The #3 'step' of forgiveness, incidentally.. addresses this
circumstance; at least in part. {see, below}
3. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean reconciliation with the person that hurt you, or condoning of their action. What you are after is to find peace. Forgiveness can be defined as the "peace and understanding that come from blaming that which has hurt you less, taking the life experience less personally, and changing {in part} your grievance story." {actually, the word "modifying" would've been more accurately used here, than "changing"{!}
 
..Also, though I'm unable to currently 'document' it, in a 'Chapter-
and-verse' Scriptural sense, {maybe some 'believer' can!?} just as
you've no doubt have heard the expression: "No good deed goes
unpunished" {sad, but mostly true!}, the same holds true {in an
'ultimate' sense} Re. God and/or society 'judging' {as in, punishing..
or perhaps chastising} the offending person{s}.
 
..And if per chance they escape society's 'justice' the God-ordained
'karmic' law {although it's never referred to as "karma" in the Bible}
insures that though 'Divine-justice' may seldom be swift, it is Always
'Sure'! {I suppose one could 'google': Divine justice; for documentation,
Scripture!}

So, if i understand U - which i din't - would it b OK to pull out my Glock an Clock the Kid in the leg? Just so he has something to remember N case he not become observant. OR - When u b harmed - just turn the other cheek - which in my case would b facing up from my over turned Potty Wheel Chair - and then say Bless U my Son ???? I need an answer - for today i go to the mall --- thanks

You could take a few tips from the Romans who fastened swords to their chariot wheels. This might be illegal in some US malls, so maybe you should try baseball bats. Hollowed out and filled with cork...3 on each wheel. Bat man. Once you've cleaned up the malls, you can start on the footpath..taking out the mormons..two at a time. Be warned though, they could fight back, by fixing deadly sharpened bibles to their bikes. This could get ugly.

so the answer is ???
 
Don't need a story -- need a:
yes
no
maybe
go 4 it
shoot em in the butt
call for takeout from Benigans

No, you should not clock the kid on the leg. I could not forgive the kid until he showed remorse.

go 4 it
 
one in the leg
 
That gives him a chance to forgive you!
 
 
--SoCo

We have a tie -
1 say NO
1 say - YES n the leg
 
Need someone break the tiebreaker since i put off going to the mall today - hope to go tomorrow - if i gets (the) (a) (right) (correct) Answer --
 
i b awaiting your answer/s
 
Thanks

STILL WAITING 4 someone to break the tie - i just gotta go to the Mall on or before Tuesday ---- Help me OUT

We have a tie -
1 say NO
1 say - YES n the leg

Need someone break the tiebreaker since i put off going to the mall today - hope to go tomorrow - if i gets (the) (a) (right) (correct) Answer --

i b awaiting your answer/s

Thanks